janji

suatu hri lalu
sbuah janji seolah asa
akan hadirnya pelangi pasca hujan
dan terbitnya matahari stelah bulan

lalu janji itu kekal adanya
hadir dlm harap
dingin tak tersentuh
walau melekat di ingatan

suatu hri lalu
satu janji ku semat di hati
tanpa suara
tanpa warna

aku janji
takan pernah minta siapapun tinggal

karena aku takan sanggup
percayai adamu kan selamanya
lebih dr itu
aku takan bisa abaikan janjimu

Superman - Episode Dua

Even heroes have the right to bleed...

Kalimat itu ngbekas dalem bgt d ingatan dan hati gw. Seolah ngbawa gw untuk inget episode2 masa lalu, waktu dmana seorang jagoan tergeletak sakit... waktu dmana seorang jagoan ga berhasil nahan airmata ketika pesawatnya tinggal landas...

Deretan kalimat2 pendek dalam percakapan dunia maya pagi ini sbenernya ga lebih dr sbuah omongan sederhana, bukan perbincangan hebat soal hati apalg politik. Gada rahasia yg terungkap, gada pertanyaan yg ga terjwb. Tp ada satu hal yg gakan pernah bisa disetel untuk jd invisible.

Deniable, yet exist...

b e r h e n t i l a h

April pun nyaris usai, caturwulan pertama 2009 akan slesai dan aku tiba2 seolah tersungkur terpental terlontar dan terjatuh. Rasanya nafas msh tersenggal2 dan dudukpun belum tegak. Sebuah kesadaran menghantam hati, membuyarkan sebaris tanya yg berderet rapi.

... what have i done?...
... what have been accomplished my whole life?...

Dan aku pun diam, terhenti. Separuh hati tersihir beku, diam tanpa gejolak rasa. Separuh otak tersetrum tidur, walau mata tetap terbuka, menatap nanar dan kosong.

Detik ini aku berhenti.
Berhenti melangkah, berhenti berpikir, berhenti merasa, berhenti ada.
Keping2 masa lalu, serpihan angan masa depan, sebongkah cita dan impian, tertumpah dari sebuah kotak yg tertutup dan tersimpan rapat.
Dalam henti, lirih ku dengar sebuah tanya.
"Lalu apa sekarang?"

Sekujur tubuh menggigil, dingin.
Hening kian mencekam.
Gemetar jemariku terulur, menggapai segala yg terserak dihamparan
Pejam mata hantar pikir berkelana
Dalam henti, asa terucap
Masih ada waktu, semoga saja...

Superman

I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
I'm just out to find
The better part of me

I'm more than a bird... I'm more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It's not easy to be me

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I'll never see

It may sound absurd... But don't be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed... But won't you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
It's not easy to be me

Up, up and away... away from me
It's all right... you can all sleep sound tonight
I'm not crazy...or anything...

I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
Men weren't meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

I'm only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me

Inside of me
Inside me
Yeah, inside me
Inside of me

I'm only a man in a funny red sheet
I'm only a man looking for a dream
I'm only a man in a funny red sheet
And it's not easy, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm...
Its not easy to be me

...Superman by Five For Fighting...

Even heroes have the right to bleed
Even angel needs to learn how to fly
Even an angel could break your heart
Me, blue...

Taking a Deep Breath

Normally, we always want nothing but the best for ones we love.
As parent do their children, as siblings, as too friends..

Still the abnormality never ceased to happen.
Murder among family member, betrayal, just name it, you'll be amaze.

During the normal period, there will always people trying to drag you down to the abnormality, to the limit of your normal thinking. Regardsless blood relative, this people is everywhere.
A why will be useless. A cry will lead you nowhere. Just hold on to something, close your eyes and take a really deep breath.

Be gone you,
No way your spell gonna do me harm
As I will never leave my abnormality state

Dream on, please yourself...
I will not care, nor mind
As for me, you are invisible

Mirror mirror on the wall..

No such thing as perfect person
Its always a good one at the right time
There will never be the best one
As you are not The One

Dont tell smone that they smell bad
If you dont smell good yourself
Dont hide behind smone else's bad
Be brave n face your own

If you have the gut to be mean
Have a big heart to have those back
Other people are mirror for ourself
As what goes around, comes around..

Sshh.. quiet!

I believe that Facebook was created to accommodate a virtual reunion and gossip (ha-ha!). To find long lost friends, colleagues, employers or even lovers.. Your call, to approve or ignore them.

Been seeing too many of its bad sides lately.
A friend of mine felt intimidated by her friends for her current situation as a single-mom and her not-extraordinary-employment-title which were being questioned and compared.
Another pissed-off for being removed by her friend.
Some even having affairs with their someone-from-the-past.
The insecurity of seeing their spouse being themselves, happily exposed.
As for myself, getting tired for all those my-so-called-unimportant-question.

Dont take facebook seriously, its only meant to bright your day and let you cherish the memories.
Dont question things, dont do politics-whatsoever, have fun and blend.
If you dont speak the same language, observe if you must and comment afterwards.
Above all, stop comparing and start having respect on each other's achievement.

I am 33, single and happy.. no complain.
So why should you??

I am drunk

I remember your smell
Today of all days
I could smell you on my skin, all over me

Cast a spell dear, I'll be there..

Wedewww..

Dulu waktu rok biru/abu2 itu masih jd kebanggaan
Ga perlu google-map untuk tau yg mana rumahmu
Karena cukup lewat dpn komplekmu
Dan memandang sedikit genteng rumahmu
Mukaku langsung merah kuning hijau
Jantungku bergetar sjuta puluh kli lipat

Dulu waktu belum ada handphone
Koin seratus rupiah selalu ada dlm kantong
Kartu telepon pun ga pernah kosong
Hanya untuk dengar suaramu
Walau kemudian akupun seolah habis kata
Tersenyum malu dan mengangguk
Padahal kmu ga bisa liat
Mukaku yg tersipu malu

Kini ada internet, lengkap dengan webcam
Aku bisa tinggalin pesen di ym
Bisa kirim email
Dan bisa liat muka kmu kapan aja
Bahkan bisa nemu rmh kmu yg entah ada dmana

Tp untuk kli ini,
Aku cuma akan tulis ini, dsini
Buat kmu..

Ya, aku kangen...

Note from Dama, on fesbuk

Just share a fact, HEAR WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant tobe.
Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you trulyhappy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends".
A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle.
If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better".
You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women..
He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.
If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything.*
He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behavior.*
Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...
Even if he has more education or in a better job.

Do not make him into a quasi-god.
He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man.

If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending...
Compromise is two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships. ..
There is nothing cute about baggage...
Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...
A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. ..
Look for someone complimentary. ...not supplementary.

Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted

Never move into his mother's house..
Never co-sign for a man.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.*
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phill

You should know that:
You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one. They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one.

Ladies take care of your own hearts.... Share this with other women and men (just so they know)... You'll make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare..

If I am to be..

If I am to be married,
Let it be for my own wishes, my own need and my own thought
Above all, my own happiness
Dont let my married reason be my age, my status, or the world's oppinion

Being the 3rd person

As a woman who spent most of her life being single, I could definitely say this in black and white with no grey area..

Ever feel like not going smwhere cos all your friends come as couples?
You prefer to just stay at home when many of your friends gather smwhere and you're the only georgeous available woman..
In many cases I did prefer to stay at home and enjoyed my being visible as a single person.

But I could ensure you that I will do my best to always be with these people, let them be with their husband and kid, I would never have to worry of being the invisible third person.
As life gets tough and the bet gets higher, there will be few left that allow you to feel the honour of being the visible third person..

And I am thanking you for giving me the honour, wufyu dears..