RainRainRain

its raining again here now..
hopefully i will never bored you with this rain foolishness
with the rain, all the feeling returns

missing the day where you drop me off
waved you goodbye just to see you afterwards
cant seem to forget the look in your eyes..

missing the day when you held my hands
in the most peculiar way no one else does
can still feel your warm fingers though..

i am sooo missing every silly foolish romantic things
with faces flashing cross my mind
how i enjoy those moments and cherished them with all heart
still i keep the names, places, moments
as all in the past has taken part of becoming my present self

Siti Nurbaya

Dengan caranya sndiri, perjodohan jaman siti nurbaya itu ga bakalan ilang dari muka bumi. Hari gini, dmana internet udah bukan suatu hal yg bikin kta tercengang, masih ada aja perjodohan ala siti nurbaya terjadi. Entah karena terpaksa/dipaksa atopun karna emang udah jlnnya smhow..

Lebih nyaman buat gw pribadi untuk nyebut proses itu sbagai perkenalan instead of perjodohan. Karna klo perjodohan, kyanya gw ga punya lg hak untuk ngeles ato ngbantah. Tp klo perkenalan, para mak comblang mberi kbebasan buat gw untuk ngliat, ngjalanin, mnilai n mmutuskan. Lbh adil n no strings attached.

Buat gw perjodohan itu menyebalkan, ato klo mo pake istilah lbh ekstrim, perjodohan itu mengerikan.
Menyebalkan karna bikin banyak pihak berharap atas ssuatu yg bahkan belom gw pikirin ato mungkin belom gw liat..
Menyebalkan karna bikin banyak pihak udah sibuk dengan khayalan atas sbuah resepsi pernikahan.. (wehhh sapa yg mo nikah sbenernya sih??)
Menyebalkan karna kmudian yg patah hati itu bukan mreka yg dijodohkan, melainkan mreka yg smangat ngjodohin..
Lbh parah lg klo smua proses perjodohan itu dilandasi sbuah kata 'hutang'. Baik itu berupa hutang materi atopun hutang budi, which make things even worse.

Gw gakan nyangkal bahwa ga gampang nemuin sseorang yg kmudian kta anggap cukup nyaman untuk punya hubungan lbh dalam, tp jg bukan brarti perjodohan/perkenalan itu satu2nya cara. Terus terang, klo boleh milih, gw pasti akan milih untuk nyari sendiri jodoh gw. Biar waktu dan hati gw aja yg nyari n nemuin sendiri. Tp gw jg ga sadis2 bgt kok. Yg penting dr awal jelas bahwa konteksnya adalah sebuah perkenalan, bukan perjodohan. Dan gada keharusan buat gw ngjlnin smuanya.

Saat ini gw ngbuka hati gw -bukan lg brusaha ngbuka hati, please note ya- buat sgala kmungkinan. Biarpun gw ternyata msh jd orang yg cukup rese n nyebelin karna ttp keukeuh dgn nilai sgala ssuatu dr rasa nyaman yg gw punya saat ngjlnin stiap fase idup.

Nikmatin smua yg ada, brusaha untuk ga sering2 terlalu sriyus ngadepin idup dan slalu percaya klo penolakan dan ketiadaan jg sbuah pilihan.

I think ya, klopun suatu hri nanti manusia berhasil nginjekin kakinya d planet pluto, perjodohan dan perkenalan ala siti nurbaya akan ttp ada..

Rejeki gakan ktuker beybeh, do enjoy life to its fullest.
Artinya: klo emang rejeki gw akan dtg lwt sbuah perjodohan ala siti nurbaya, be it hahaha..

hey u..

lucu...

sms yg 2kli itu kmana?
ga inget ya pernah kirim sms itu?

hahaha emang bneran ga penting kli ya?

U Jump, I Jump, Let's Jump...?? Shall we jump??

Ga gampang untuk nyediain diri jd tpt bersandar, apalg klo kta jg lg ga dalam kondisi yg baik. Rasanya pengen jd burung ostrich aja kdang2, biar bisa nyelupin kpala k dlm tanah n ga perlu ndenger apa2 lg.

It wud be great having a smart friend while we're being the silly one, ato sbaliknya. Tp sama skali ga seru klo dua2nya lg being the silly friend. Pasti butuh pihak laen supaya netral n bisa mikir. Perlu otak pinter laen buat ngasi pencerahan.

Skarang ini, rasanya gw udah kya titanic aja. You jump, I jump. Gebleg! Ngapain coba kan dongo bareng2 bgitu. Udah gtu tenggelem pulak, hayahhh... Mesti ada yg bw pelampung lah klo pun ikutan jump.

While myself think i'm all shaped, my other self think there's smthing wrong... 

And all the sudden, everything feels totally wrong...

Once again, me being the silly friend..

hahaha enjoy my other part beybeh, better know this part now n walk away.. other than latter while regret is no longer an option, or worse - walking away is not a decision to consider.

PS: I Love You

if we're all alone,

then we're all together in that too..

...cool movie, glad finally had a chance to watch...

Escape

Once a while, life will be too complicated and unbelievably insane. When the anger, confusion or sadness has filled your heart.. many times you just dont know how to react. Jaw dropped, brain malfunctioned, out of word.

Numb... blank... even tears is not an option.

You just need an escape... a price yet so frikkin' expensive.

I wont promise to be there by yourside at all times
I wont promise for things to get better
I wont promise that it will be less painfull
I might not hold your hands or give you my shoulder

But I will be your escape
I will put up a safety net to catch your fall
And that you will never be alone

And when the days past
We will sit on a couch, holding a cup of hot coffee
Talking and laughing on all the regrets, pain and silly things..

..i'm saying prayers for you, hang in there dears..

Watery Eyes

I saw your face yesterday
Among those people standing on the street
Your smile, those eyes...
My eyes got warm and I felt the tears

I miss u,
Were you thinking about me?
Did you miss me upthere?

I miss you...
Have a peaceful rest there dear

My New Job

This facebook thing is turning into a daily task for me lately. It is truly amazing seeing the number of friend I made virtually, over 400.. Well, its included my relatives thou, but still..

The evolution thing is no joke, you know.. Its for real, n its happening.
Those with chemistry will stay, the rest will move on from your life.
From hundreds of my virtual friend, I cud count them within the fingers on my hand of those I keep a daily contact or those still around within distance.
In the end, only the closest will stay..

For whatever happen in the past, I believe we all have our reason to choose different path
Not that its better than others, sometimes it really is chemistry thing, nothing else
But forever they will be in my heart
Let them be listed virtually in facebook.. or elsewhere unknown
As I believe, that love will never end...

unless, off course.. it does end when the ugly gets worse *_*
this is one of many reason of separation anyhow